My Inner Peace…

Sometimes, you think you want to know the truth…until you actually get it.

Sometime, somewhere you’ve heard someone say with conviction,  "There are two kinds of truth…" You might have even said it yourself.

What usually follows is another sip of whatever you’re drinking and then the definitive explanation of the two kinds of truth. Something like (swallow): "there’s the truth that hurts us and the truth that hurts others" or "there are truths of reason, and truths of fact" or, maybe "there are absolute truths and then there are relative truths…"

Wait till I get going! Where was I? Ahh, yes…

There is "the truth of the intellect and the truth of the heart," "the small truth and the great truth," and don’t forget "the literal truth and the poetic truth," but the best one we’ve come accross goes like this: "There are two kinds of truth, the truth you can read in a book and the truth that any fool can see." Actually, if you think about it long enough, it makes no sense to say there are two kinds of truth. The truth will always be the truth… no matter how hard it hits us, no matter how painful it gets… the truth will always be it.

Sometimes, people think they can fool you and say stuff you want to hear… Stuff like, "I like your dress," or "You’re lookin’ good today," or "You take care," or worse…"I Love you." For all we know, what he or she really meant was, "You have a poor sense of fashion (with evil grin)" –> I already have a person in mind for this, or "You look awful but I wanna be nice today so I’ll just say you’re looking good," or "you take care on your way out ‘coz I don’t wanna talk to you ‘coz you’re boring," or worse, "I love you (laughs). I know you want to hear these words so hear them loud and clear baby!! (with evil intention)."

Sometimes… Well, most of the time… It’s not what you say; it’s how you say it. But then again, an actor’s words can be mistaken for the truth. But still, the point remains: TRUTH does hurt, but it will set you free. If you ask me, I would rather have someone be blunt about the truth and say it to my face, than act normal, and then the next minute, everything’s a mess. It’s more difficult that way, you know.

It’s hard to think how people can easily make up words and say these to you. Making you believe it’s the truth, but as time passes by, you realize, it’s not. They were just words put together to make you feel like heaven at that exact moment, where he or she sees that your door of vulnerability has been opened. At that moment, you suddenly feel that everything’s true… until… until you come to that day… that dreadful day, that you then realize, everything was a lie…and then you realize, sometimes, you think you want to know the truth, until you actually get it. The truth will set you free, but first it will make you miserable.

Sometimes, you think you want to know the truth, until you actually get it.

As he woke up, he instantaneously rushed to the bathroom, took a bar of soap, and started swinging it through his body…(swinging?? Is that even the right term? Hehe.. Oh well, moving on..) He puts on shampoo on his head-hair, shaved off his mustache and beard (well, whatever’s left) and rushed to the closet to get dressed for work. In the office, he sat infront of his computer, started typing and clicking and flipping through pages…

Tsk.. Tsk..

Poor guy, you’d think… Poor guy… He is no different from any other geeky-hard-working-workaholic-son-of-a-gun-type’a guy.

Well ladies and gentlemen, guess what? This guy?

This guy is me… Guddz Gonzales… Yep! Me.. Me.. Me.. and, oh.. Me. My life revolves around schedules. Twenty-four (24) hours is more often not enough to cover for the things I needed to do for the day…but you know what… In my everyday life, I make it a point to have my own little corner…and stay there…and be at peace…be myself…with no one around me… just me… (mentally…, or emotionally, at least).

In my own little corner, in my own little space… I can be whatever I want to be. I can be the richest person in the world, be the CEO of whatever company, or be like Superman, with laser beams.. oh wait! Make that, Spiderman with sticky webs.. Yeah, I like that…sticky webs. Hehe… Or, I can be just about any body.. a famous popstar, or a super genius guy next to Einstein, or..well… you get the picture. I can be whoever I want to be. Heck, I can even be the Prince of Egypt, or an heir who always had his robe done…or a lottery winner (why not?)…

Stressful as our days may be, let’s not forget the child in us…and play with outselves..(ok, I know what you’re thinking… not that kind of play.. Hehe. What I meant was…Mmm..you know what I mean, mentally and..well, mentally. Use your imagination). That’s something no one can ever take away from you. That’s yours…do with it as you see fit.

And…when you’re done, when your mind and body are now in balanced position…perfect symmetry and all that sh**, come back to the real world, and once again face the music. It doesn’t hurt to be  busy…but it doesn’t hurt to escape a while and free your mind…even just for a while…for a short while…in your own little corner.